Monday 23 November 2009

Useful Research Paper Phrases (With Translations)

I'm a great believer in the 'Scientific Method', however its important to remember that most of the value of the method is that it offsets the shortcomings of scientists and their weaknesses (making mistakes, jumping to conclusions, etc). So the Scientific Method can be seen as a check-and-balance against the human and psychological factors that get in the way of clear reasoning.

In that spirit, I present 'Useful Research Paper Phrases'. Variations of this list seem to have been going viral in research labs, stuck up on the wall with drawing pins, for at least 50 years.

Useful Research Paper Phrases (With Translations)

1. It has long been knownI didn't bother to look up the original reference
2. A definite trend is evidentMatlab will fit a curve to anything
3. Of great theoretical and practical importanceInteresting to me
4. While it has not been possible to provide definite answers to these questionsThe experiment didn't pan out, but maybe I can still get a publication out of it
5. three of the samples were chosen for detailed studyThe results of the others didn't make any sense
6. A careful analysis of obtainable dataSpilled beer on lab notebook, three pages illegible
7. Typical results are shownThe best results are shown
8. These results will be included in a subsequent reportI might get around to these some day
9. The most reliable results are those of Jones (1987a)He was my graduate assistant
10. It is believed thatI think
11. It is generally believed thatA couple of other guys think so too
12. Much additional work will be required before a complete elucidation of the phenomenon is reachedI can't explain these results
13. Correct within an order of magnitudeWrong
14. It is hoped that this study will stimulate further investigation in this fieldThis is a lousy paper, but so are all the others on this miserable topic
15 Thanks are due to J. Jones for assistance with the experiment and to S. Smith for valuable discussionsJones did the work and Smith explained to me what it meant

2 comments:

Anonymous said...

hello meme bake, i was reading a comment you left on another site about the 'climategate' affair. i enjoyed your well considered opinion and think you write very well. i too sit somewhere centrally within that whole climate debate (also consider myself an environmentalist; whatever that means these days) and for a long time have been more confused than inspired to take any step toward either extreme; i think that will not change anytime soon. science? (!) i cant help but think this is a new animal that is being created (evolved?) here, some sort of sciensopolitical-managerial funding conglomerate.

anyway, just thought i would write and comment. love the blog and the name, very funny. i assume the name is a play on clam bake, i may be wrong though.

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